Today is the day that we would have returned overseas from furlough if we had not resigned. It has been a very hard day. We have had all kinds of feelings, ranging from sadness to giddiness. From reflectiveness to feelings of anticipation.
There is a large part of me that wonders what my colleagues think about me. After all, our lives intertwined so much for so long. There is another part of me that says since I am following God, it doesn't matter what others think of me. I just sincerely didn't want to discourage my fellow missionaries from the task at hand. Of course, I can't help but to think about all the wonderful things that God would have done had we stayed. That is moot, since He is going to be doing so many wonderful things here on the home mission field.
I am truly enjoying being a pastor; I NEVER thought I would. I see God use me each Sunday as He gives me the words to say; words that I would have never thought of on my own.
Yes, it is bittersweet; I would have loved to have gone back, but I dare not disobey. My place is serving at God's direction. I wouldn't rather be any other place in the whole world.
I anticipate this being my last post on Nomad 4 God. I will however not delete this blog, but leave it up as a tribute to God's grace.
Monday, January 07, 2008